Meet the monsters!
'Welcome, adventurers to "Duncan's School of Dungeoneering". Here you will learn the ropes of treasure hunting and dungeon delving...
...and what better way to start the day with some basic exercises in enemy recognition?
We'll begin with the less dangerous denizens of Terrinoth - individually no threat to big, bad, tough sword - swingers like yourselves! But in numbers? Watch out!
Goblin archers
'Time is money everyone, and time wasted on wading through these gobbos is less time for exploring and lootin' Watch out though! Many a careless wanderer has realized too late that goblin archers like to gang up on ya - from out of melee range if they can. They may be poor shots, but sooner or later one of those arrows is going to get through...
...your visor...
...your collar...
...remember it only takes an arrow in the knee to end your adventuring career! - Although I hear the city guard often takes in the injured and puts them to good use.
Zombies
'Ah, the shuffling undead. Common to every corner of the Kingdom, but ESPECIALLY where you are going to spend the majority of your time...
...you can outwit them for sure, but you can't easily stop them coming. "Quantity has a quality all of its own" as someone once said!'
Cave spiders
'Eight furry legs? CHECK!
Shiny, beady eyes that catch the glimmer of your torch in a dark room? Check!
Giant pincers that deliver a poisonous bite? OF COURSE!'
Just like they say about rats in the city of Yew 'Nork...
...there are always a few just yards away from you, even if you can't see 'em!'
Barghests
'Many a careless adventurer has mistaken these hounds of hell for a pack of wolves at long distance, but truthfully? Being ripped apart and being eaten alive by actual wolves would be a blessing compared to being caught by a pack or Barghests! Tread carefully, and take my advice, you'll smell that flesh before you see them!
'Now then, now we've got that little lot out of the way, let's take a look at some of the 'larger' types of monster...'
Ettins
As the song goes:
'They're big, they're mean, they aren't that often seen...'
...but when they ARE you'd better be beware. You can disrespect their lack of brains but not their brawn - a good hit from that home-made mace and we'll be scraping you off the flagstones and sending you home in a bucket!' Actually SCRATCH that - me and the staff at Duncan's aren't paid enough to go in and get you...
...Unless you buy our convenient 'Adventurer's Injury, recovery, and repatriation insurance' (TM) that is! See our broker, Peg-leg Pete, in the office if you are interested.
Elementals
'Bah, most continents and their petty wizards can barely summon a single FINGER of Elemental flame. Our wizards though...
...elementals that are composed of fire, earth, air, AND water.
...If they don't burn ya, they'll drown ya...
...if they don't drown ya, they suck the air out of your body...
...and if that doesn't work they'll simply crush you with their giant hands!'
Merriods
'Wassat you say, you can't swim?
Don't like water?
Avoid those puddles then har, har!'
If you aren't careful they'll have a long tentacle wrapped around you before you know it, and those hooked teeth will latch into your flesh and begin pulping your insides as they drag you down...'
'You made it this far? Well, most don't - they died along the way - which is why payment is upfront right!?
Pay attention now for the big guys, the Shadow dragons. Not only are they faster than you, larger than you, and tougher than you, these guys and gals are brainier than you too. The images below capture the unusual shadow dragons that live in these parts. How they'd end up in these unusual colours I can't tell, but around the city we call them 'Ol' Swampy' and 'the Autumn Queen'...
...they could be a mated pair, or just good friends - nobody knows because anyone who asked them and got an answer never made it back!
Pray they never cross your path my friends...
Pray...
...As I always say, 'knowing your enemy is the first step to surviving your enemy.'
I'll see you next week - those of you that make it back from your descent into the ruins that is....'